i'm not quite sure wat im up to right now..

wats on my mind...i must be out of my mind right now...to be outside..

hmmz..yah its late..

sld get a scolding..someone sld really scold the shit out of me to wake me up...

i wonder..

im actually tapping on wireless now bloggin...hmmz

dun feel like heading home somehow..didn't tok to mum...quarrelled with her the other day...

over...me having my responsibilities and i see a need to at least take care of my dad next time..just giving him some money when im working next time...

yah...over tat..its nonsenses and crazy....lead to nonsenses quarrell...madness!

no one can help me i guess....only myself...

i noe i had to pull thru this ordeal....just a matter of time..but when???

im running out of time...

i'm officaily broke and speechless...as in..lost my voice totally aft the bash!

stupid pay still delaying!

aft all the shouting..and everything in noisy area. totally lost it!

plus sickj...sore throat...

plus..i gt to rush my mc proj tml...aft i wake up...god pls bless me...im so screwed.!

plus SM project due in 10 days time. im just so screwed!!!! TOTALLY!!! someone pls provide me with my clone to function faster.

oh......and...andy is drunk....zhaoting is drunk....adeline is drunk..i tink yong feng is drunk too...they are M&P members and my fellow head.

frens saw me carrying 2 gers out...and im still "sober" sober enuff to noe wat im doing....still alright. but im really sick of alcohol...

my bunch of members are crazy!! they are out to get andy and i drunk....2 bottles...

2nd bottle was meant to drink "nick": madness!!!

just remembered ....we finish up 2 bottles within 1.5 hours. hah. i tink the second bottle took us only at most 45mins to finish up bcos its just poured into ppl's mouth from the chivas bottle...

and..zhaoting is damn funny and cute when she's drunk..the meanie mich took pics with everyone tat's drunk! haha..

zhaoting keep saying nabei nabei nabei and tok non stop

oh and i pierce my ear again today! yay!!!

tired...stressed out

i cant complete my stuff on time...

suddenly there's so many things to do...

look thru my past entries....

emo again...reminds me of tat short part of my life.

sad and happy...i wonder if i sld regret or just live strong.

hope or not to hope..

will we ever meet again?

ignoring the pain doesn't mean it's not there.

still exist within somwhere

nevermind the hours the minutes the duration

all u need is just salvation

i feeel like a young kid once again...

gobbling down 3 cans of heineken straight and feeling terrible...

fallen many times...able to pick myself up...

why isit so hard this time round...why?

teach me how again....i forgot how to move on....

i forgot how not to feel..how to be strong..how to be selfis and just pay attention to myself....just myself...care abt myself more..

assgn deadlines....test..bashes up ahead and i feel fucked up..

i wana buck up...back to my usual self but i cant seems to be able to..

someone just pls teach me how..once again.i lost it.

why?

why am i so weak....

caught 3 movies over the weekend.

thurs was dvd nite..fri was cashback. den sat was secret.

cashback was SUPERB!! MUST WATCH SHOW....love every part of it

the story...the way the film it..everything.

the time stop thing...nice..just great.

definately worth 9.50!!

As for Secret....hmmz...starting was boring...totally boring bcos its irritating to hear jay chou mumbling when he speaks in the movie...

he mumbles and mumbles...and i haf to understand thru the subtitles

thank tat someone tat invented subtitles in movies...haha...

movie started to be slightly more interesting when its 3/4 into the movie.

Ending was crap i feel...or wat are they trying to say...

the part where he saw her again.

he left at nite...but saw her later in the day....tats point one

btw, those tat are intending to watch secret. please do not read on....

bcos im gona type and complain abt the ending. hah!

point 1 above.

point 2. if time lapse is 20 years..and she was already dead on the grad day.

den when he go back in time....she sld be dead wat...why will he see her again..

k...if she didnt die...she's in school..den school ended wat.already grad wat...why will he see her in sch.

unless..time lapse back to even b4 she met him..

hmmz..even so..he sld bum into other ppl instead of her in the classroom.

in short...the ending was bad. badly linked to the story..tats wat i feel

had a debate with her over the movie ....haha..how interesting and fun...haha...

dunoe whose right yet. so gona ask ppl to go catch it and let us noe wat they tink abt it.

heh!

as usual...things are not the same as it is animore...

so much as i want things to be the same ...i cant cos i dun haf the power to

i wish i could stop time. really...or rewind time. replay it...pause it..and replay tat particular part.

still...im okie...i hope i am.

sometimes i just wish that im cursed to have some special powers ...some abilities to read ppl's mind..their thoughts.

Enabling me to understand ppl better...letting me noe how to handle them...

Preventing me from being sensitive...

sometimes i run..i chase...i pursue but i end up falling

very often i question why

but the answer seems miles away.

i'm tired.

slp.

approaching 1 mth soon....

how fast

feels as if its been months instead.

watching my dexter season 2 now...and stealing short glances at my baby occasionally as she do her work/surf the web...looking so engross in her stuff....

....

imagine hanging out in sch from 10++ am all the way till 9++pm...

totally shag out...

no im nt being hardworking or watsoever by staying in sch till they closes...etc...

only attended half my lec today and i spent the whole day in sch!! madness!!!!

tired...

i'm mentally exhuasted. yeah...like who isn't

i guess...all council excos and ppl involved are all exhuasted!

there are nearing 90 applicants tat are interested in joining rmit student council.

i was amazed by the figures. like totally~

2 more days to go...busy busy busy...

time to slp in my baby's arms again....ciao.

sch at 10am again..interviews...grrrrr

I'm feeling weird over stuff again...

i hope im just being over sensitive which is the way i might behave during my stupid monthly thingy....

cant explain....

weird.

sad.

maybe im just hoping for too much or hope for certain things to happen but it didnt.

I cant help it but keep questioning it and wondering y i'll feel tat way.

-sigh-